Ok, I dragged my self into Curves yesterday. I did the 3 mile advanced walk at home, had a prayer time with my accountability partner and actually showed up and joined.

The lady who runs the place is named "Becky" (honestly Lord, don't I have enough Becky's in my life now? Is there any reason for adding another to the mix?") I seem to collect Becky's and Sandy's like some people collect antiques, or memoribilia. Isn't there anyone out there named Mary or Ellen or Jennifer? Three of any thing is considered a collection and I have a lot more friends named Sandy or Becky than just three.

This Becky is very personable and right away wants to be my best friend. I later discover that she has been a weight watchers leader for 15 years and just exudes perkiness. ( Did I ever tell you how much I hate perkiness?)

"Oh, "she gushes, "You are so going to love it here....I can tell right away you are going to be one of our success stories! Here's one of our calendars, my personal card with my home phone number, the keys to the kingdom, a list of monthly activities , the hours we are open, the list of restruants we go to every Tuesday night , a listing of all the area Weight Watchers meetings, and area Bible Studies. This is also the phone number of one of our members who has lost 85 pounds since July just in case you need added incentive. But first sign this waiver!"

Me: Waiver? What am I signing?
Her: "That you won't sue me if you die while exercising here!"
Me : (Laughing) Well, if I'm dead, you won't have to worry about me sueing you!"
Her: Looking very seriously.....not you, so your family won't sue me!
Me: Are you CPR certified?
Her: (Looking at me susciously) Should I be? Do you have heart problems?
Me: No, I don't but even the Girl Scouts require a certified person with them at every meeting or camp out. You really should have some one here that is certified or at least has had some emergency first aid experience. Do you have a defibrilator on the premises? Did you know that CPR alone seldom to never brings back a victim's heartbeat alone. Victims of cardiac arrest need early defibrillation to the heart for the best chance of survival. AED's can increase survival rates by 30-40-50-even 60 percent over calling an ambulance alone.
Her: (Perkiness starting to drain from her voice and starting to think I'm a spy from a competing gym, replies icily) I'll look into it. Sign!


We go through the routine dance of weighing and measuring and hit the machines. She explains every piece of equipment very throughly and each muscle group that the machine targets. She is very knowledgeable and exacting in the preformance of each exercise. She explains patiently that form is important to get the maximum effectiveness from each piece of equipment. She demonstrates each piece of machinery and watches me as I return the performance. I'm starting to warm up to her now that she is all business.

We go around the circuit together and she encourages me to go through each machine again so she can observe. There is definitely an edge to her voice and I can tell from her change in expression that she is now starting to believe that I'm a plant from corporate headquarters checking up on the local franchise owners. This delights the "bad grrrl in my rebellious self" so I suddenly can't remember anything she has so patiently taught me. I mess up, she corrects, she demonstrates and finally out of frustration she has me stand in the middle of the circle and observe. Talk about performance anxiety!

As I'm observing the correct "way" I also notice several people with very bad form and can see potential injury from several ladies that are over extending and squatting past the level of their knees (which I cheerfully point out to my new best friend!) so she correct them.

OK, so I've probably alienated (my new best friend)and as I'm leaving she calls me over to the office, politely but firmly telling me that the squeaky wheel gets the most oil so if there is a problem she needs to know about it so she can fix it.

I smile sweetly and assure her that she'll be the first one to know.

I leave with satisfaction that I'm again in charge of my life.

Daisy Dilemma: Devilish Daisy is soooo baaaad!

Labels: Curves